National disability advocacy organizations and public media outlets have recently been addressing the uptick in the use of the “R-word” in public dialogue.

It makes me sad, mad, and frankly, it’s hard to process that I’ve been writing about the “R-word” and the disrespectful way people talk about individuals with disabilities for more than two decades. I published my first piece about this issue about twenty years ago in a daily newspaper. That article focused on some popular movies at the time and their portrayal of disability. Over the past 20 years, I’ve written pieces about the Spread the Word to End the Word campaign, but apparently, it’s not enough.

In a time when we seem to understand so much more about cultural awareness, kindness, and human dignity than we once did, derogatory words about individuals with disabilities somehow remain pervasive.

I wish I could tell you these words only come out of the mouths of extremists or insensitive people. Many are shocked when they hear me say that I’ve heard the “R-word” in professional settings (not my current one) more than once in the past 10 years. In today’s society, the “R-word” is still used—sometimes more than just a punchline and it must stop.

According to the Special Olympics, research shows that 70% of posts on social media about people with disabilities have negative implications, and 60% contain a slur.

In response to this uptick, the National Down Syndrome Congress (NDSC) recently issued the following statement and press release:

“NDSC condemns the use of the ‘R-word’ in all contexts, regardless of intention and without exception. It is disrespectful and dehumanizing to all people with intellectual disabilities.”

So, what can we do?

Don’t Let It Go

Conflict and confrontation are never comfortable. I get it—nobody really loves it. But letting the use of the “R-word” go unchecked contributes to the problem. When someone uses the “R-word” in your presence, lead with empathy. Approach the conversation with kindness and explain why the term is harmful and outdated. Share a personal story about your experience with disability and how the word makes you feel. Approaching the situation with kindness and from a personal perspective is often the best way to make a lasting impact on someone’s behavior.

Model Inclusive Language

Use respectful language in your everyday conversations. Correct yourself and politely offer suggestions to others if you or they accidentally use outdated terms, explaining why you’re making the change. For example, avoid using the word “normal” to describe people without disabilities, as it implies that individuals with disabilities are abnormal, reinforcing harmful stereotypes and exclusion.

Support Advocacy Campaigns

Promote campaigns like Spread the Word on social media or in your community. They have cool swag that can spark conversations. There’s also plenty of great inclusion-themed merchandise you can use to keep the conversation going year-round.

Leverage Social Media Thoughtfully

Social media is a powerful tool for raising awareness. Use it as your personal megaphone. Share a personal story or post explaining why the “R-word” is harmful.

Set an Example in Small Group Settings

Whether it’s at a family dinner, with friends, in class, during a meeting, or at an activity, be intentional about fostering an inclusive environment. If someone uses outdated or hurtful language, politely remind them how it makes you feel and suggest more inclusive alternatives.

Impact of Our Actions

Every step we take, big or small, to combat the “R-word” has an impact. While it’s disappointing to see an uptick in public use of the term, change can happen through action. Each step we take influences others, creating a positive impact on language and paving the way for a more inclusive world.